10 Things I (Don't) Hate About You

Marriage (for the short time that I’ve enjoyed it) has been anything but what I expected. Sure, a lot of the basics were predictable: waking up next to someone, seeing each other after work, not having to drop Michelle off after an evening together, etc.; but there were so many things I wasn’t counting on. A few of the highlights are listed below, but before we get to them, the challenge goes out to my five collaborators: what did you encounter that you weren’t expecting?

In no particular order:

1. Our home is more decorated than any place I’ve lived in the past four years. The amazing thing about this is that even though our home is made up of an amalgam of random pieces of furniture, art, and other items sourced from a bunch of very different places, it all works together. And Michelle’s responsible for that.
2. I have WAY more clothes than her. I mean, a lot. I knew that this was the case going in, but I had no idea how big the disparity was. I think the second purge is happening soon.
3. She gets cold. It’s summer in Houston, so it’s approximately the temperature of the core of the sun most days, but we still sleep pretty bundled up every night. The best I can do is put one leg outside of the covers, which actually works remarkably well.
4. The shoe count is pretty even. In spite of #2, we have about the same number of shoes. Yet that’s what always gets brought up as the lynchpin of my metro-ness. Go figure.
5. We’re getting a piano. I don’t know when, and I don’t know how, but apparently this is going to happen.
6. I’m a control freak in the kitchen. Didn’t realize this until now, because all of my previous roommates, without exception have been eaters rather than cookers. Now that I have a lovely wife who likes being in the kitchen, I get all possessive. I need to get over this.
7. There are red hairs everywhere. I mean, seriously.
8. I put my foot in my mouth so often, and I just coast on my merry way. I now have an immediate check and/or balance on my abuse of power. (Note: I need a new #7)
7. Coffee is emotional currency. I can show love to my wife simply by combining hot water and beans. How cool is that?
9. She still won’t drive my car unless she has to. I don’t particularly care, and I like driving her car, too, but I think I could count the number of times that she’s sat in the driver’s seat of the Mini on one hand.
10. All pet peeves and pettiness aside, I never counted on how much our love would expand and grow now that we’re together all the time. I fall more and more in love with Michelle with each passing day, and while it sounds like a stupid cliché, it’s absolutely and unquestionably true.

Okay, now I’m all misty. Someone else better pick up this gimmick and run with it while I go find some Kleenex.